Recently I spoke of our individual experiences here on this earthly realm of existence in my essay Let them have it. Our perceptions create our realities and because of this what is truth for one may not be truth for another. Loving, caring, feeling and wanting the best for them does not change this fact. This is their experience!
Our lives are a journey of discovery and believe it or not, prior to our conception, we chose the stage for our situations and circumstances to play out. We made a conscious decision while in the spiritual realm that we would experience everything we are experiencing right now in order to work out prior conflicts within ourselves while interacting with others. It was no spin of the roulette wheel.
Simply stated, if we believe water is fire we will never bathe. Our souls will never be cleansed and we will never discover the Truth that we all seek, but there is a reason for this. There is something within us known as the Ego of which we must conquer in order to complete what must be completed in our infinite journey of ascension. When we do we will realize that the fire is really water and we will drink, bathe and enjoy it for all that it is.
Jesus often stated, “Those who have ears to hear let them hear” and knew that at times we are not receptive to truth. The Ego has the power to blind us and make us deaf to the Truth. It is up to us to receive and allow for It to enter. We could spend hours or decades trying to get through to those that we love, but we will only create more barriers between us. The door will remained locked from the inside, furniture will be pushed up against it and soon that door may never be found by them again.
Sometimes loving is letting go. We must relinquish control and trust that when God wants those people, relationships and lives to be healed they will be. Who knows, it just may be our own Ego getting in the way of His plan. We could be the ones adding hours or even decades to their healing.
This may be the most difficult thing we may ever have to do. Our hearts will weep from the inside out. Time will pass and we will not be able to reclaim it. Yet, if we continue to push at that door the door will only push back. We will only injure ourselves by straining our hearts, souls and spirits and end up forfeiting the joy of the NOW.
“Sometimes, we have to let it all go and allow them to help themselves. It is told that even Jesus couldn’t do great miracles in his hometown. You see those who know us personally often look at us as just a family member or a friend. They really don’t connect with us in that healing sort of way. Sometimes, we have to stand aside and allow them to live the life they want to live. I am sure you have heard the saying, “If ain’t broke…don’t fix it.” Well, if people do not think they are broken, no-one will ever convince them they need fixing.
When we try to fix those who don’t feel they are broken, they just turn right around and do the exact opposite of what we want for them. Then, we are the ones who-in turn-become hurt because we begin to question our abilities and gifts.
Sometimes, when we want those people to change into what we want them to be, we end up controlling them and that is no good either. You see, each individual came to this earth to experience who they want to be. I used to think it was my responsibility to change people (including my family). But now, through many failed attempts, I realize I am here to inspire people to want change in them. People respond better to inspiration.
Just love them and hope that someone (at some time) can inspire them to want change in themselves. That is the type of change that will last forever!”
–Michael Merritt
I had to thank Michael for this reminder. He was absolutely correct. I just wrote about exactly that last week in Let them have it on my blog but failed to see how it applied to the situation I had been struggling with. I guess it is because of the constant cries for help I receive from the person in this scenario. Bottom line is that they really only want the answers they want and mine do not fill their order. I was just feeding into what they were laying out.
It’s their experience and we must let them have it. We make our choices and live our lives in order to experience what we need for our journey and ascension. Others may not be who we want them to be, but they are Being all that they are created to be.
During the holiday season it is important for us to remember to appreciate everyone for exactly who they are. Diversity is the spice of life. Besides, who wants a bag full of the same kind of candy? There is something wonderful about everyone. Concentrate on their Gifts, relish in all that they are and appreciate with the utmost gratitude the opportunities they have given us for contrast.
In faith always,
Ron Ash
Prayers of Empathy
Heavenly Father, Help us remember that the jerk who cut us off in traffic last night is a single mother who worked nine hours that day and is rushing home to cook dinner, help with homework, do the laundry and spend a few precious moments with her children.
Help us to remember that the pierced, tattooed, disinterested young man who can’t make change correctly is a worried 19-year-old college student, balancing his apprehension over final exams with his fear of not getting his student loans for next semester.
Remind us, Lord, that the scary looking bum, begging for money in the same spot every day (who really ought to get a job!) is a slave to addictions that we can only imagine in our worst nightmares.
Help us to remember that the old couple walking annoyingly slow through the store aisles and blocking our shopping progress are savoring this moment, knowing that, based on the biopsy report she got back last week, this will be the last year that they go shopping together.
Heavenly Father, remind us each day that, of all the gifts you give us, the greatest gift is love. It is not enough to share love with those we hold dear. Open our hearts not to just those who are close to us, but to all humanity. Let us be slow to judge and quick to forgive, show patience, empathy and love. Matt 5:44