Fall Down Stay Down
You know we can’t just give up after falling one time. How far will we go in life if every wrong turn only causes us to retreat back to our starting point? In life we will sometimes be forced to confront things we don’t like, places where we are uncomfortable and people who just rub us the wrong way. Often these are the not so high hurdles we must jump in order to get where we need to be. Never turn a hurdle into a brick wall.
I work with an incredibly talented cook and baker. He can take the low grade ingredients we get and turn them into something really special. In addition to that he is an expert on saving time and money. When I told his wife the he is well too overqualified to be working where he does she said, “He does not do well working for others.” She began to tell me two separate stories about different places he had tried to work in the past. One was more of a factory than a bakery. Again this was not really where someone of his abilities belongs. The other place seemed to be right up his alley.
One thing stood in his way. He had to face a hurdle and his ego did not want to jump over it. You see, his new boss rubbed him the wrong way on day one. It would seem that he did not appreciate the time saving suggestions that were offered him by, “some newbie Betty Crocker baker” and the advice was turned down on the spot.
Remember, it’s not always what we say, but the way we say it. This is where our ability to empathize with others turns from silver to gold. You see, when we are able to put ourselves in the shoes of another we enable ourselves and disable their defenses. We can either jump over the hurdle or turn and walk away from it. In our empathy is our answer.
By asking the question why we just may find that the hurdle was just an illusion, but by concentrating on the problem we add density to it. However, as we recognize it for what it really is we can concentrate on the solution. So, what would be the best thing to do in this situation? Well, there are two ways we can approach this.
It is obvious there is a battle of the egos going on here. Although the baker is well intentioned the ego of the owner is not allowing the advice. The baker is becoming easily insulted and responds to the owners comment as an attack and his ego causes him to retreat. He quits his job and never attempts to find another similar position because of this one conflict. The baker expects to run into this problem in all future positions related to this type of employment. In this he is bound by a self perpetuated illusion.
Suppose he approached this in a different way? What if he recognized his supervisor’s insecurity? Perhaps he would begin to feel pity for him while empathizing with the boss’s weakness. It is in empathy that we often find truth and from truth we can find the root of the issue. This just may be why God sent him here and why he is experiencing this happenstance. It is possible that he is where he is to help another to deal with their problem.
Now that we empathize we can formulate a different approach. We must bring down their defenses and enable them to move forward. This will require the removal of our ego. The best place to start is by praying for this individual with the utmost sincerity. This will confirm to the heavens that we truly want to evoke positive change and will enlist the help of many heavenly beings. The power of love is insurmountable.
This is now an opportunity to build a solid relationship with our boss. Maybe apologizing for possibly coming off the wrong way is the best place to start. Like I said previously; it’s not just what we say but how we say it. It is very easy to misinterpret tone. This boss may have been experiencing constant criticism from other owners who are higher up in seniority and the baker’s advice could have been the icing on the cake. No pun intended.
Remember, the most powerful tool in Satan’s arsenal is our own ego. This is how we allow him to manipulate us and keep us from Promise. When ego is removed the hurdles are lowered and we can easily leap over them. In fact as we empathize with and pray for those who have hurt us those obstacles quickly disappear.
I recall another situation several years ago in which a member of CCC was battling with his boss on a regular basis. She was constantly attacking him verbally and making him feel very small. With every comment she made to him his perception of her would grow. In his mind she was an enemy. I think he even used the term monster to describe him. His entire insides were being twisted up. Tensions were high and he felt as if he was at the end of his rope. Everything his boss did would add to his perception of her.
One day during a study group I was able to get him to open up about this and accept another possibility. Perhaps she was subject to this same kind of attack at home? Maybe her husband was constantly putting her down and attacking her verbally? This attitude had to be coming from somewhere. So that night we discussed the power of empathy and how when we pray for our enemies healing begins.
The next week he came back a changed man. His boss was treating him in a different way. He began to look forward to his work day. In fact, other opportunities began to open up in his career. Another organization approached him with a better position closer to his home and with better pay. He was ecstatic and appreciative.
You see, when we fall down we can either stay down or rise to the challenge. We must look through the obvious and examine the obscure. What our eyes and ears perceive is seldom the reality of the situation. We must dig a little deeper to find the root, extract it and plant new seed.
It is in our hearts that the truth resides. As we empathize with others we clear the debris of false perceptions and enable Spirit to act on our behalf.